Bizarre Records

This is a repost of a post on the old BizarreRecords blog

Lord Antics & the Lyons Band
“Hotter Than Hot:
1970 Antics disc

Lord Creator
“Big Bamboo”

The best Calypso records are local, low-fi productions straight from Jamaica, the Bahamas, Trinidad, or other Caribbean islands.

Talk about home made! Check out Lord Antics: this album cover is made from plain green paper, folded and held together with masking tape. Instead of cover slicks, the cover picture and track list are glued on. Not just the cover, but the vinyl itself is pretty crappy, like most of the original records from the legendary Dynamic Sounds studio in Kingston, JA.

Lord Antics actually plays in the country Mento style. Believe it or not, this record is from 1970… I had always figured if for 1960 or so! Included here are versions of several “dirty Calypso” classics:

Lord Antics & the Lyons Band: “Sixty Nine”
Lord Antics & the Lyons Band: “Big Bamboo”
Lord Antics & the Lyons Band: “Sell The Pussy”

And one of his own:
Lord Antics & the Lyons Band: “Fork She Garden”

Here’s another, far more polished version by Lord Creator from Trinidad:
Lord Creator: “Big Bamboo”

…and another standard:
Lord Creator: “Bang Bang Lulu”

And finally, a version of “Sell The Pussy” by Junior Jennings And the Humble And the Meek from the Caymans:
Junior Jennings: “Sell the Pussy”

With the obvious entendre of “big bamboo”, I’ve always thought it quite amusing that the Houston Astros’ Minute Maid Park has a faux-tiki bar called “Larry’s Big Bamboo”. I hadn’t realized that this bar was named after a cool-sounding joint in Florida, which burned down recently.

Thomas Moore
“Sings The Family”

This is a repost from an archived BizarreRecords blog
There’s a thrift store I go to that always has tons of Children’s records. Especially those newer 80s-90s ones with lots of dull songs about obeying your parents and respecting other cultures. I usually only buy them if there’s something unusual there, like maybe a song about how to pee or perhaps a cover of “I Am the Walrus”. Anyway, there were several records (all signed on the back) by a guy named Thomas Moore… The others were slickly-made things with the usual themes about exercise and hygiene, but one stood out for its craptacular home-made cover consisting entirely of ball-point pen X’s. A friend was over inspecting my day’s finds, and she said “I wanna listen to this one.” Putting the German disco records aside, I put on “Thomas Moore sings The Family”. Holy crap.

“Don’t Feel Sad”

“Don’t Feel Sad”

Basically, it’s “Don’t feel sad, if you’re whole family is dead.” I suppose its not the message that’s bad (unlike the singing, songwriting, and piano)… But it is a bit shocking right off the bat. Other songs include “The New Baby At My House”, “Look What I did This Morning”, “I Get Mad”:

“I Get Mad”, and “I’m a Special Kid”. My favorite however has to be “The Family Jog”

“The Family Jog”… Perhaps the greatest ode to jogging ever performed. Or the only one.

So I immediately went back today to get the other records. They don’t seem to be quite as crazy as “The Family”, but there are some good songs like “I Like Water”

“I Like Water” and “Bus Driver”

“Bus Driver”

Mr. Moore, according to the liner notes, holds college degree in music, and a Ph.D. in child development. He has been an Education professor, and apparently now is an education columnist for the Charlotte Observer.

These recordings are available on CD (and cassette, wouldn’t you know) from Dr. Moore’s website.

Ishmael United
“If You Can’t Shout SAVED! You’ll Have to Face the Penalty”
1980, Star Song Records

Repost of an archived BizarreRecords blog:

Ishmael United

Here’s a record I bought just to see how a group of obviously English hooligan-types ended up with a record on a Christian music label from Pasadena, Texas. I still haven’t figured that part out yet, but when I finally put the wax on the turntable I was quite surprised to hear some pretty cool old-school UK pogo-punk coming from my speakers. I had to double check to make sure I hadn’t put a Vibrators record on by mistake.

Turns out “Ishmael” is some sort of Christian children’s show host in the UK — I’d tell you more but his website is a horrifying migraine-inducing monstrosity that I couldn’t stomach for more than a minute or two, just long enough to snag this from his bio:

Ishmael (Rev Ian Smale) has been travelling around internationally in a ‘full time’ capacity since 1970 and has been privileged to see many men, women and children become Christians, filled with the Holy Spirit and healed, through the work God has called him to. He has written and recorded nearly 400 songs, released 36 albums of his and other writers songs, having produced 15 of these. He has also released 2 music videos and written many books, some of which have been translated into German, Dutch, Danish and Romanian. He has also been on national television many times, and is one of the very few people that has ministered at every Spring Harvest since the beginning. Although he loves spending time with children his heart is to see all ages praising God and having fun together. His travelling time is divided into adult seminars teaching about the importance of children, and the all age musical celebrations that he calls ‘Praise Parties’.

This record has a few good punk tracks, as well as some questionable ska/reggae. More enjoyable if you ignore the lyrics!

TRACKS:
Song of the Last Generation
If You Can’t Shout Saved…
Jesus Trip

ALBUM INFO: Ishmael United, “If You Can’t Shout Saved!, You’ll Have to Face the Penalty”
1980, Kingsway Music, Star Song Records, Pasadena, Texas.