Feel Fit and look good in your Banana Hammock

Barton Horvath
“HEAR HOW you can Feel Fit All Day”
1960, Carlton Hear How #11

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.


Barton Horvath

Was still pumping iron in Florida as of 2002.

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

She does things with her mouth you wouldn’t believe

Erm Westmore, narrator
“Facial Exercises and Massage Routines for Skin Beauty”
1966, Holiday Magic Informative Cosmetics

“Milady can now create new Beauty, Glamour, and Personality with her Holiday Magic Informative Cosmetics”

“Facial Exercises” side 1 (From WFMU):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

“Facial Exercises” side 2 (From WFMU):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

The story of the Holiday Magic pyramid scheme

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

apostle-aproved workout

Various Artists
“Aerobic Celebration!: Aerobic Excercise to Contemporary Christian Music”
1982, Newpax #33133

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

Roll Out the Legwarmers

Mother & Daughter

(Elena & Lynne Goriscak)
“Polkarobics”
Polkarobics Productions, 1984

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

best looking, but worst rollerderby team in the league

“Roller Dancing for Fun and Fitness”

Gateway #7609
1980

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

The excercise bike James Bond uses

“Slenderide: Sound Exercise Program”
#SL-3736

“slenderide

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

baby just wants a nap

Bonnie Prudden
“Fitness for Baby and You”
Warner Bros. #1542

FROM THE BACK COVER:

“Keep in Mind that it really takes two years to get over a baby and back in top, top shape. No matter how much you love children, plan wisely. One more thing… When the youngest goes off to school you’d better be in shape to go off to something too… or you’ll be bored to death. For anything these days, you’ll need a good, sharp, active mind (that’s up with things) and a strong, slender, tireless, attractive body. Still one more thing…and very important, Men may like babies, they learn to love them very much in time (especially when they are no longer babies) but your man loves you now. Keep yourself attractive, active and aware of him… not just the baby to come…or even the baby arrived.”

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

Kermit will love it

Miss Piggy
“Aerobique Exercise Workout Album”
Warner Bros. #23717-1
1982

From the Back Cover:

“Many People come up to moi, out of le bleu, to inquire how moi manages to remain so slimme and trimme in spite of moi’s busy, demanding life as an international superstar. How is it, they wondeur, that I can possess such a fabulous physique, what with all the lavish brunches in ritzie hotels with moi’s frog… the glamorous garden parties with those teensy sandwiches with the crusts cut off… Surely, they insist (people do get a little pushy sometimes), surely moi must have a secret.”

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM

the Lord’s Legwarmers

Various Artists
“Firm Believer: A Complete Excercise Program Featuring Today’s Finest Christian Music”
DaySpring #DST-4105
1982

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail

buy this record at GEMM

no icky girls allowed

Charles Roy Schroeder, Ph.D.
“Rope Jumping for Boys & Men”
Kimbo #1132
1974

From the Back Cover:

“This is the only record that has been prepared strictly with the male in mind. The masculine approach is reflected in every aspect, including the musical selections, manual terminology, and use of a male in the manual illustrations.”

facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestmail
buy this record at GEMM