Don’t Forget To Bring A Towel

Jerry Barnard
“So High”
JB Productions #8201

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What about soccer??

All Sports Band
s/t
Radio Records / Atlantic #RR19321
1981

Finally, here’s a record that reminds me of why I got into collecting bizarre records to begin with!  A completely fabricated, major-label group specifically designed to cash in on the 80′s teen fad of… sports.

All Sports Band

All the top American sports of the day are represented.  Car racing, from before car racers were rednecks.  Baseball, from the days when baseball players were skinny and doing coke instead of steroids.  Football, because he’s the black guy.  Boxing, because he’s not wearing a shirt.  And of course, karate, the king of all 1980′s sports.

Here’s a vid of Dick Clark talking with the band on American Bandstand.  Apparently the actual musical performance was just too valuable to post on Youtube.

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No, Apple, you did not invent the word “App”


Jack Benny and Friends
“Music to Write Apps By”
1960, State Farm Insurance Records #L8OP0956

Yes, people were using “apps” as an abbreviation for “applications” at least 50 years ago… as they were being driven around town in model-T’s by their negro chauffeurs.

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Quick! Grab him! Before he gets away!

Norman Ray
“That’s Him”
Gospel Recordsing #1001

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Mountain Climbers

Faith Singers
“I’ve Been On the Mountain”
Audio Dimension # 573N10

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Bring Me Men

The USAF Academy Concert Band & Cadet Chorale
“Bring Me Men”
US Air Force Acadamy

I think these guys need to go on a Bone Voyage.

 

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Cash or Charge?

Continental Oil Company
“Charge!  1966 Sales Program”
1966, Conoco

“Here comes the crusty, hard-as-nails Old Trooper and his dedicated horse Reveille riding hard out of Fort Conoco to bring you the news of Conoco’s 1966 Sales Program.  The Old Trooper is a new symbol that embodies the aggressive spirit and bold new challenge to the petroleum market place.  He’s the leader of the ‘espirit de corps’ for Conoco sales people everywhere.  You’ll see him often in 1966.  Listen to his words of wisdom as he calls the troops together to whip up enthusiasm for the new year.  Jump into the spirit of his challenging call to arms… CHARGE!”

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Because anything Australian must have kangaroos

The Australian Jazz Quartet
s/t
Bethlehem #BCP-6002

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Barroom Stories #3: fake barroom edition

Hickory
“Whiskey Woman”
Country Kitchen #2010

The cover of Hickory’s album appears to have been taken at one of those old timey carnival shooting galleries (notice the fake bottles and colored targets).  Since the band is from Houston, it was probably at Astroworld.  (Aaaand, confirmation:)

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Barroom Stories #2, BBQ edition

Patsy Silver
“Roll Call”
1980. RLA Coastal #81480

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I guess THIS is the place: Lou’s Saloon, Corpus Christi TX

And Patsy is leader of Western New York’s Hardest Rockingest band, Silver Xtreme! (WARNING! Hilariously Awesome Website!)

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